What happens when you prioritize authentic relationships over financial gains in community work? Join us in this enlightening episode of Community Possibilities as we sit down with the inspiring LaDonna Collins. Fresh from her role as executive director of the Rome Floyd County Commission on Children and Youth, LaDonna now brings her transformative vision to the National Family Support Network. LaDonna's story is not just about resilience but the power of meaningful connections in professional growth.
She shares her unique perspective on community work and nonprofit leadership and discuss the significance of building genuine relationships. Her innovative initiatives like "Books, Barbers, and Beauticians" and the engaging "Little Black Dress" event demonstrate how a heart-centered approach can foster thriving, collaborative communities. These stories aren't just feel-good moments; they offer actionable insights for anyone involved in community building, emphasizing that the best outcomes often arise from the most authentic interactions.
Our conversation also delves into the transformative power of strong community partnerships and the crucial role of Family Resource Centers. Learn about the five protective factors that support families and how these centers are making a difference across states and even internationally. LaDonna discusses the challenges and rewards of community leadership, touching on common misconceptions about nonprofit funding and the importance of changing that narrative. This episode is packed with valuable lessons, stories, and the kind of inspiration that can help you make a lasting difference in your own community. LaDonna's Bio
LaDonna Collins, a native of Rockmart, Georgia serves as the Sr. Training and Standards Implementation Manager for the National Family Support Network which serves as the national coordinating body for Family Resource Centers within the United States & Canada. Until recently, LaDonna served as the Executive Director of Rome Floyd County Commission on Children and Youth.
She is also the owner of Pinnacle Developmental Services, a youth development and mentoring organization. LaDonna is heavily involved in her community. She served on the most recent SPLOST Committee in her community, was the moderator for her local city commission candidate forum, serves on an advisory board for a local university and was recently awarded, Heart of the Community through a local nonprofit. aDonna is married to Eric CollinLs and they have an 8 year old son, Parker, who will be starting 3rd grade this fall at the Montessori School of Rome.
Like what you heard? Please like and share wherever you get your podcasts!
What happens when you prioritize authentic relationships over financial gains in community work? Join us in this enlightening episode of Community Possibilities as we sit down with the inspiring LaDonna Collins. Fresh from her role as executive director of the Rome Floyd County Commission on Children and Youth, LaDonna now brings her transformative vision to the National Family Support Network. LaDonna's story is not just about resilience but the power of meaningful connections in professional growth.
She shares her unique perspective on community work and nonprofit leadership and discuss the significance of building genuine relationships. Her innovative initiatives like "Books, Barbers, and Beauticians" and the engaging "Little Black Dress" event demonstrate how a heart-centered approach can foster thriving, collaborative communities. These stories aren't just feel-good moments; they offer actionable insights for anyone involved in community building, emphasizing that the best outcomes often arise from the most authentic interactions.
Our conversation also delves into the transformative power of strong community partnerships and the crucial role of Family Resource Centers. Learn about the five protective factors that support families and how these centers are making a difference across states and even internationally. LaDonna discusses the challenges and rewards of community leadership, touching on common misconceptions about nonprofit funding and the importance of changing that narrative. This episode is packed with valuable lessons, stories, and the kind of inspiration that can help you make a lasting difference in your own community. LaDonna's Bio
LaDonna Collins, a native of Rockmart, Georgia serves as the Sr. Training and Standards Implementation Manager for the National Family Support Network which serves as the national coordinating body for Family Resource Centers within the United States & Canada. Until recently, LaDonna served as the Executive Director of Rome Floyd County Commission on Children and Youth.
She is also the owner of Pinnacle Developmental Services, a youth development and mentoring organization. LaDonna is heavily involved in her community. She served on the most recent SPLOST Committee in her community, was the moderator for her local city commission candidate forum, serves on an advisory board for a local university and was recently awarded, Heart of the Community through a local nonprofit. aDonna is married to Eric CollinLs and they have an 8 year old son, Parker, who will be starting 3rd grade this fall at the Montessori School of Rome.
Like what you heard? Please like and share wherever you get your podcasts!
Hi everybody, welcome back to Community Possibilities. Today. Ladonna Collins is my guest Now. Ladonna and I have known each other probably for six or seven years, something like that. We first met when she took over as the executive director of Rome Floyd County Commission on Children and Youth and the first time I met her man I thought wow, this woman is going to go places. She recently left her position with the commission and took a position with the National Family Support Network and they serve as the national coordinating body for family resource centers within the United States and Canada and some other fun places. So, as I predicted, ladonna is a woman who is going places.
Speaker 2:
She is one of the most energetic, dynamic, creative community leaders that I have ever met in my 20 years of serving communities and working in evaluation. And LaDonna, it's really funny. I had to ask her this question on the podcast hey, ladonna, do you still hate evaluation? Because, oh my goodness, my job, my role with her and her Region 1 Family Connection colleagues was to provide TA and, yeah, ladonna didn't love evaluation so much, but we're winning her over slowly but surely. She is a diehard Atlanta United fan. She is happily married to Eric Collins and they have a beautiful son Parker, married to Eric Collins, and they have a beautiful son, parker. So I hope you enjoy this conversation, fellow community leaders, because you can learn so much from LaDonna. Enjoy our conversation and I'll see you on the other side. Hi everybody, welcome back to Community Possibilities. I know it's been a skinny minute since we have uploaded a podcast, but I am so excited to have you meet my friend, ladonna Collins. Hey, ladonna, how are you?
Speaker 3:
Hi Ann, how are you? I'm so excited to be with you today.
Speaker 2:
Well, I am excited as a word. You hear a lot on podcasts so I really must come up with another one. But I love you so much I hope you know that. So I just wanted to share a little bit about how you and I came to meet. So we were both working in different capacities for the Georgia Family Connection. I worked for the partnership. You worked for the Rome Floyd County Commission on Children and Youth, which was the collaborative up in Floyd County. That's how we met. I was doing TA evaluation assistance to 14 of you guys in region one and then, oh, whatever adds up to 40 with my other regions. But you were the second person that I worked with in Floyd County. You had a predecessor and you came in and kind of took over for someone who had been there a long time.
Speaker 3:
Yes, and that's gonna be. I look forward to speaking about that and how we had to work on some things to transition, to move us in a different direction. So, yeah, that'll be a great conversation today.
Speaker 2:
Yeah. So I've been wanting to have you on the podcast for a long time because, as most people know, I work a lot with community coalitions and community collaboratives and I've seen some good leaders. I've seen a handful of great leaders and I've seen a lot of not so great leaders, and you were definitely in the shining star, charming, know how to herd the cats and all of the things.
Speaker 3:
Well, thank you, it was a fun time and hey, let's get into it and talk about it.
Speaker 2:
All right, awesome. So I always ask folks to introduce themselves and tell me how you came to be who you are Not. You know where you went to school and your first job, and then you took that job. That's yeah, that's not it Right. How did you come to be who you are, job, and then you took that job? That's yeah, that's not it right.
Speaker 3:
How did you come to be who you are? Well, and you know, crazy enough, I do have to talk about a little bit about my first job. Okay, hey, Right, right, but before that I do want to take a small time, a small second, and just talk about, you know, some minor experiences in college, from a very small town in Georgia Rockmark, Georgia and went to college and went to Georgia Southern. Now, the reason why I give you that information is because I actually was in culture shock at Georgia Southern, actually was in culture shock at Georgia Southern. Now, the culture shock that I had is different from what you might think, but I had never been around so many other African Americans in my life before until I went to Georgia Southern. So that has a preface of why and how I am who I am because I experienced culture at Georgia Southern when I hadn't experienced it in my hometown. And then, you know, obviously I matriculated through there.
Speaker 3:
My first job, though I'm not and I know you said not to talk about that my first job. I knew that after I got my degree I knew that I needed to work with teenage girls, Gotcha, Because when I went off to college I had a lot of fun. I had a lot of experiences. That makes me who I am today and it helped guide me through that. So I knew I needed to work with teenage girls and the job that I was supposed to get when I graduated was a public health educator. And just so happened, in my hometown, or the area that I was living in, there was a public health educator position at the teen center, at the health department, and that's really where I grew up and that was my first encounter with community. And yes, I was a teacher. Yes, I did a lot of different things, worked for the housing authority, but that was in 2004.
Speaker 3:
When I came back in 2019, those same some of those same people that were there in 04 and 05 and 06, even when I was a contractor they remembered me and that's why it was easier for me to get back in the community. But I am who I am because of the experiences that I had in college and not burning bridges in a community, and I think that's vitally important to share, because sometimes, when things go good or things go bad, sometimes we burn bridges in a community because we think, oh, I'll never come back there and that's what I told myself Great time while I was in my community, my first couple of years out of college, making those simple mistakes that we do make when we're young and in our, in our, in our jobs for the first time. But I didn't burn those bridges and I was able to come back into my community after being gone 13, 14 years and then flow into where I am today and that was building relationships. And I have a weird way of building relationships, but yeah.
Speaker 2:
Okay, well, I don't. I want to know what you mean by weird way, but I want to go back. So, for those of folks who are, cause, we have folks that listen all over, not just in the state, but all over the country and internationally too, which kind of blows my mind. But so Rockmar is a very small town, as you said, and you now live in Rome. Yes, correct, and both of those areas are predominantly white. Yes, yes, right, and I think that's what you mean by the culture shock. When you went to Georgia Southern and you have, like, a group of folks that you didn't have, was there other learning lessons that you care to share? I mean, a group of folks that you didn't have? Was there other learning lessons that you care to share? I mean, don't share anything that you don't want your mom and dad to know about.
Speaker 3:
You know what, though I? Really? One thing that I did learn about myself, even back then, is sometimes you can live off a borrowed self-esteem. Oh, say more about that. What do you mean? Yeah, so I was the child of, I'm the fourth child of, and my I was my daddy's girl, and my daddy always told me I was really, really pretty and I could do all the things, but then, when I got away from his sight away from his sight I no longer believe that. So I started making decisions that went against how I grew up, and so that's what I realized when I was 30, that there was a such thing as borrowed self-esteem. And I realized even, you know, at the age of 28, 29, and even up to 30, even though I was married, I was living off of what my daddy always told me that I could do and who I was and who I could be, but I never really believed that for myself.
Speaker 2:
Yeah, yeah, and it's only experiences that give us that confidence oh yeah right for sure. Oh my gosh, yeah, I gotcha. So you thought you were going to be a public health educator.
Speaker 3:
I did. I thought I was going to be a public health educator and I had a whole goal of owning. Weird enough, I wanted to be a public health educator and make my way into nutrition, and I wanted to be a nutritionist, a public health educator, nutritionist and I wanted to open up my own holistic wellness spa and that was the goal that I wanted. But life takes you in different places and at the end of it all, I could never leave. I could never get away from community like it was just something about being involved and being engaged and even though I was a teacher involved and being engaged and even though I was a teacher, it never felt right until I got back in to the community. And even during that time, my husband and I we started our own business where we became life coaches and we had state contracts with the Department of Juvenile Justice and we mentored and life coached teenagers who was on probation in 10 to 14 counties.
Speaker 3:
So everything that I've done has led me to community. It's led me back to one thing that I say is helping people reach their pinnacle, and that's just a part of who I am. I call myself a lid lifter, and that's just a part of who I am. I call myself a lid lifter and I want you to work on the things that you're a 10 in and let me do the things that you're a one or two or three in, so you can focus on your good, and that's who I am. That's really who I am, which is why I love the whole collaboration thing that I did with the Rome-Flate County Commission on Children and Youth through Family Connection.
Speaker 2:
Yeah, all right. Well, let's let's dig into that because, like I said, you walked in after a long term leader had retired, and that's challenging in tight knit communities like where, like what we're talking about here, that's, that's. That can be hard.
Speaker 3:
Yeah, you know what? And I had a mentor and he's still my mentor to this day and fortunately, he was on the board. When you know, the person that I succeeded was on the board and he told me, LaDonna, you're gonna have to allow the community to grieve. As if it was a death. And so I really did. I allowed the community to grieve, but one of those things in the grieving process was understanding and realizing and accepting that people are still going to call you asking for her. I'm still going to get emails with her name addressed to it. I'm still going to get mail with her name addressed to it.
Speaker 3:
And one thing that sometimes we don't get is yes, things need to be changed in the community. Yes, things need to be changed in the organization or collaborative, but that don't mean the first day or the first five weeks or six weeks or even six months or even a year, you go in and change those things. And I think that's where I hit the sweet spot. I honored the person that was there before me. I realized and I let the people I let the people in the collaborative, I let the people in the community where I allowed and trusted the people in the community to talk about what she did without being offended, and I think that's where the sweet spot is is that lack of offense and understanding that the community could very well grieve the loss, even though it wasn't a death she just retired.
Speaker 2:
Yeah, yeah, exactly. Death she just retired. Yeah, yeah, exactly, and I think that's really wise. I can think of definitely at least one time in my life where I probably could have just been in the listening mode and the learning mode when I stepped into an organization.
Speaker 2:
So I think that's really fabulous advice for community leaders and I love that you love communities as much as I do, so I want to talk more about that, and then we'll talk about your new role that you have. But so tell us about the work that you did at the commission and you slowly kind of put your own stamp on the collaborative at least in terms of leadership, for sure, and some of the strategies that you implemented. So talk to a little bit about that. What are you most proud of?
Speaker 3:
You know, I'm really most proud of the programs and activities I was able to. It's just something about me, something about my personality. I don't mind reinventing the wheel, but I do want to do something different that people have never seen before, and I think that's what made our community thrive and collaborate even more, because I was able to go in, obviously with all due respect of whoever was there before me, but I also enjoyed doing the things that were very like I call different, weird, and I mentioned earlier that I kind of built relationships differently than some people.
Speaker 2:
Yeah, yeah, yeah, I forgot to go back to that. What do you mean? You build weird relationships.
Speaker 3:
Well, and you know it takes me, it takes me. I have no problem going into a room, I have no problem introducing myself sitting at the table. None of that is my problem and I wouldn't even call it a problem that I'm about to say. But I like to navigate the room, I like to find out, I like to observe people and I like to build relationship. Just for the objection of building a relationship, right, I don't have to want anything, okay. So yes, there might be a thunder, like there might be a thunder that someone told me I needed to know, and that's all fine.
Speaker 3:
But what I'm going to do first, before I just go up and ask that thunder for lunch or you know, and then at lunch ask for dinner, I really want to find out the intricacies of that person. So we're going to talk, I'm going to find out about you, I'm going to find out about you. Know, in our conversation we're going to talk about our kids, we're going to talk about our community and we're going to talk about our community and we're going to have a good, healthy relationship. And then I'm not going to ask you to make a donation, I'm going to let you make that donation on your behalf because you're going to see the good work.
Speaker 3:
I can remember being a part of our community foundation or actually somebody. The community foundation executive director wanted to meet me and I knew in the past that we had applied for the Community Foundation grant and we never received it. And I remember my first time meeting with the director we just had a great conversation and I remember telling her I said I don't want your money. I said, but what I do want and what I can do for you is to tell you about organizations in our community.
Speaker 2:
Wow, and because we collaborate that's who I am Did their jaw drop when you said I don't want your money Because that's probably not something they hear very often Right.
Speaker 3:
I think she was very shocked. And then I remember I remember having that conversation with her, maybe like October 23, and then October 2023. And then come early January well, it actually might've been October 22. Nevertheless, six months later, she asked me to serve on their board for the grant committee and I served on the board for the grant committee and then a year later, I ended up being the grant chair, yeah, and so obviously I'm not in that organization anymore. But now the person that's coming behind me in this position will now have leverage to now go and apply, because they'll know that this organization is not out there to get money. We're out there to help our community, help our community partners build relationships and we want to find out about them. So that's how I build relationships. I build relationships going into it specifically for the relationship, not for the money.
Speaker 2:
Yeah, absolutely, and I think that's great advice for nonprofit leaders who are always stressed out about money and funding and things like that. So years ago, I wrote this blog post on what evaluators could learn from Southerners, and it was basically this that you start with relationships. You don't start with tell me all your data right, or you know here are all the things you're doing wrong when it comes to data collection or evaluation. You always start with relationships. You always make that connection. That's just what we do in the South, at least. You would never start a relationship with business or an ask without building that relationship for sure. Yeah, you got to ask about the kids. You got to talk about the church picnic that happened. All the things right.
Speaker 3:
You know, and I've heard it said best ask for their heart before you ask for their hand. Oh, I love that and and I think that's that's what I did, and so it's unorthodox so maybe weird wasn't the right word, but it's unorthodox and I think that's where, you know, my sweet spot was that was one of my successes, amongst all the other thing, and was like building those genuine relationships, that that that was one of the successes, in addition to, you know, our books, barbers and beauticians program, where you know, and we can talk about that if yeah, absolutely.
Speaker 2:
I wanted you to definitely mention that. There is a history, as you probably know, in public health like using beauticians to educate women about breast and cervical cancer, for example, and I don't know if that's where you got that idea, but I definitely want you to talk about that and I want to talk to you. I want you to mention your little black dress event, because it's just such a creative way to get people's attention. So, yeah, talk about both of those things.
Speaker 3:
So Books, barbers and Beautician. I just remember when I first started in my former life, I was a GED instructor for 16 to 24 year olds and I remember that. And GED is General Education Department. Okay, yeah. And for the students to be admitted into our program, they had to read on a seventh grade level at minimum, and I remember these students coming in reading second grade level.
Speaker 2:
Oh my Lord.
Speaker 3:
Yes. So when I got into this position, I remember one of our strategies was increasing high school graduation rate and for me, with my former job, I knew that we need to etch that and start at the ground level, and I knew that childhood literacy was one of the best places to start. And as I was just thinking about this and just having this go through my head, I said, okay, where do kids go and adults go all the time in this underserved African-American community where, you know, our numbers were low where do they go consistently all the time? And I thought about my son. My son goes and gets his haircut every two weeks along with my husband.
Speaker 3:
Oh, my goodness, yes, every two weeks. They have a spending appointment, and so when I would go and drop him off and the the barbershop is in a hotel, so I would go and drop him off and I would see loads of kids coming in. And if we had a vacation, um, the barber would tell me LaDonna, I don't know what y'all are going to do because look at my calendar, I have 50 people on a wait list that want to come and if you miss today, you know, I don't know if I'm gonna be able to fit you back in, that's like the dentist.
Speaker 2:
Lord, lord, help you if you miss the dentist appointment and try to get back on his schedule.
Speaker 3:
Right, that's seven months from now.
Speaker 3:
So I was like, ok, I saw kids coming in and out of the barbershop and there is already this program called Barbershop Books anyway, that I admired.
Speaker 3:
So once again, I didn't reinvent the wheel, but I looked at their system and I knew for our small community we needed to do something a little different. So I just, you know, told the board about it and we launched it without knowledge. We just knew, I just knew that I needed to get books in the hands of those kids. I knew those kids were coming weekly or every other week and I knew I could talk to the barbershop, the barbers and the beauticians and they would help the kids read because it was low hanging fruit for them. I just needed them to be there and I needed to use their spot. I would provide the books, we would provide the snacks and as we got that set up, we got grants from so many organizations our you know, our Amerigroup, our CareSource, you know our AmeriGroup, our CareSource, you know our Noon Optimist Clubs. We got grants, some other local organizations and once we were in it for a year, I realized that we were not getting the right kind of books.
Speaker 2:
Oh, interesting, say more about that. What do you mean?
Speaker 3:
Yeah, so I realized that we needed to get the books that the kids could reflect on. The books needed to look like them. It needed to have names that they were familiar with in it. So we had to scratch how we were getting books and we had to be intentional about going to Barnes and Noble, going to the different bookstores in different communities and finding African-American authors and even our Spanish speaking authors, because we had some kids that were Spanish speaking and we had to find the authors that looked like or mirrored the kids. And so once we did that, that's when we realized that kids, while they were coming to the barbershop to get their hair done, they were also coming to read and they were also coming to get the incentives. And then we did have the. We had it at a beauty salon and it wasn't working for the girls.
Speaker 3:
And so why wasn't it working? Because little girls in some African-an-american communities they don't go to the beauty salon to get their hair done but they do go to the braiding salon, hair braiding studios. And so that that summer, summer, the second year of the summer, we launched a pilot in a braiding studio and it took off. So we realized that we had two to three great locations at a barbershop and at a hair braiding studio, and then another smaller barbershop, and it worked for us. And just every three to four weeks we had to go by and just look at their reading logs. We changed out their books and then we started doing our surveys and our evaluation and we realized that you know what these kids felt comfortable reading to their barber and their beautician in a safe reading space. And that's what really made the difference these kids were able to read where they weren't going to be judged.
Speaker 2:
Yeah, because it's not a school. They're not having to read in front of their peers, right, all the things. That's so awesome. And I got to tell you as a white woman, as a mom and a grandmother, you know what I've been thinking about, because you're actually absolutely spot on. Those kids need to be reading for folks who understand them. They see pictures and art that looks like them. They got to recognize that for my kids.
Speaker 2:
What I wish I had done, what I'm starting to do with my grandkids, is have a diversity of what they're reading so that they realize the world is not all one color, right? Right, I mean, hopefully we get to a day that color does not matter, but we are not there yet. So when I was in Taos, new Mexico, I picked up a book about. That was written by an indigenous woman and it tells all about, you know kind of the myth, their mythology around water and water keepers, anyway. So that's kind of like what I'm like doing personally. When I look back I'm like, oh, I wish I had like done a better job of showing my kids about the beautiful rainbow that we all are.
Speaker 3:
That's great and also, you know, in addition to the books that look like them, we always some of my favorite books and a favorite TV show of mine and my son's is who, what, when, and so there are books called the who, what, when books and it talks about all of the greats from years ago and they reenact on the TV show they reenact it and in the book they reenact it, but it's the same message and so that's an awesome even now, and so some of those are some of their favorite books. Yeah.
Speaker 2:
Oh my gosh. I'm trying to remember what was that show when I was a kid You're too young Cause you're a lot younger than me that, like walter conkite, like um, oh my gosh. He hosted it and it told like this you know different stories in american history, that's the way it was. He always said, I mean, that was his sign off for his newscast. Oh, it's gonna come to me, it's gonna come to me. But I remember, like one of the sessions was on um, you know, harriet tubman, you know, know the underground railroad, all the things. That's what make that yeah. So anyway, all right, I digress. But the little black dress, what is that about?
Speaker 3:
Because that might be something communities want to replicate, oh my gosh, it's so easy and it's so much fun that you can do so. The little black dress is I called it a little black dress impact Because it makes a major impact for five days in a row consecutively, preferably during July and August, and, depending on what region of the world that you live in, you can get into October as well, but the goal is to wear the same black outfit for five days in a row without washing it. And what this does? It illustrates on a small degree because we, if you've never been without a washing machine if you've never been without, you'll obviously never understand never been without a washing machine, if you've never been without, you'll obviously never understand but to a small degree. It illustrates poverty and how people you're. At this rate, for five days, you will live the life of what it feels like for somebody not to be able to wash their clothes, and not only is it just the physical appearance, but you get into the mental appearance, the self-confidence appearance. Are people looking at me? Are people you know? Do I smell?
Speaker 3:
And so, for five days, the first year that we did it, we had over 100 women plus men and children participate and what we did is we created, got little buttons, the throwback little buttons that everybody used to love in the 80s and 90s and even before then, and we asked the question on the button ask me why I'm wearing the same outfit for five days in a row without washing it.
Speaker 3:
And we had people sign up through, you know, through Google, through a Google survey or Google sign-in sheet, and we actually hand delivered all of the buttons and inside of the little packet we had a local stat sheet and we wanted to give the people that were participating the local stats. So when people did ask them, why do you have on this same outfit for five days in a row? I was just in here and you had on the same outfit. Well, that's a great question. According to our local community, 56% of our kids live without a washing machine, or 22% of our kids live in poverty every day. So we we gave them the power and the momentum to be able to speak confidently in sharing information, and we did it through wearing the same outfit for five days in a row in the month of August and it was hot and go ahead, and I know you got questions.
Speaker 2:
I'm so excited. No, no, I love that because you know the point is, you do it. It's hot, yes, in Georgia, in the, you know, we have spring for like two days, right, right, and then we have winter again and then we have summer. That's the way it rolls around here, but I didn't know. I'm just thinking like, yeah, because I'm, I'm that spiller, right, I can, my dress would be so dirty after day one, or my outfit, or whatever, right, yeah, so I can just imagine because you're, you know, you don't, you don't feel confident or clean, or all those kinds of things, and yeah yeah and you don't.
Speaker 3:
And so we created a hashtag little black dress impact or LBD impact and we had people chronicle their experiences on their social media. And I remember this one woman. She was a new mom and we all know if you, if you've ever had a child, those first couple of months your baby is spitting up, your baby is doing all the things with liquid yes, exactly On both ends. On both ends. And she chronicled her experience and how she felt as a mom and she was like, okay, yeah, no problem. Before this week I was able to throw my dress that my baby spit up on in the washing machine, but this week I couldn't. And she said people would come to the door and bring me gifts for being a mom. And she said I felt embarrassed. And you know, and I even started to feel embarrassed, I remember I had Knicks on my dress and I remember that last Friday we went out to eat with my parents and I was like you know what I'm going to keep on this dress? And I remember walking into the restaurant and I felt embarrassed because I felt self-conscious. It'll be something that I never forget.
Speaker 3:
And we added on a piece.
Speaker 3:
What we did is we have a group home in our community, and so we asked every participant to donate a new outfit to this group home.
Speaker 3:
And so that day that we did it, we did it on the whole week, but the middle of the week we had all the ladies and men meet in a central location and they brought the clothes and we had, we we asked quality questions and how it made them feel and you know they were able to make it through hump day and last two more days.
Speaker 3:
But you know, we had some people that just weren't able to make it and just because they couldn't understand it. But you know, one, one exciting piece out of this and was a lot of our bank tellers did it. But you know one exciting piece out of this, ann, was a lot of our bank tellers did it. And so when people were coming through the drive-thru line or they were coming through just to the bank, they saw the button and it sparked up wonderful conversation for our community to realize that literally we have people, all of us, in our community, wherever you are, you have people that are living in your back, your backyard, your back door in your community, that lack access to the things that we tend to take for granted, just to be, more poverty informed and not make assumptions about people, which we all tend to do.
Speaker 2:
And there seems to be a lot of that going on. I want to ask you, before we talk about your new role kind of, if you have any thoughts or learning lessons about being a collaborative leader. It's not easy. I often show the old EDS commercial herding cats. It's hilarious when I'm teaching coalitions and collaboratives. It's not easy to herd the community cats community cats. So any advice you have for collaborative leaders that you could share, or anything that you know oh, this works really well, or yeah, that was not so great.
Speaker 3:
You know what, ann? I'll start off with what worked well, and it took me a couple of years to really get it and understand when you're trying to hurt community people who are experts in their field, let them be an expert in your field. You don't have to know all the answers. And I remember when we changed the way that we did our collaborative. I remember at first we came a group of us, a small group of us, came up with the quarterly topics, but then that went well for a while. But then after a little while I was like, okay, these people are experts, the community partners are experts in their fields of mental health, they're experts in their fields of education and you know on and on. So let them be the experts in your space, what you call your space. So they became that once we said hey, you guys take this quarter. Whether it's housing, you take this quarter for housing or food insecurities, whatever the thing was for the quarter. You take the whole quarter. And every month that we're going to meet, every month, we need you to bring in the speakers, we need you to help us realize your common language.
Speaker 3:
You know, in the, in the, one of my favorite ones and was when we had the um alcohol and drug awareness organization come. One of the things that we wanted was to know common language. So we learned common language no, they're not an alcoholic, but they're a person living through alcoholic addiction and so they had to tell us their common language. And then at the end we had a community fair where we lived in their world.
Speaker 3:
And I think once we started implementing that space of you be the expert and you lead us in your world and you bring us to your office and you host a meeting in your office, how do we all feel when somebody comes to our house?
Speaker 3:
We're the host and we can tell them where the restroom is, we can tell them where the cups are in the cupboard and you can wash your hands here. That's how it feels and they became a part. And then, after they were the host, somebody else wanted to be the host and somebody else wanted to come back to the collaborative to be the host, and somebody else wanted to come back to the collaborative even if they it was, it had nothing to do with them, because you guys came to my house and you were a good guest. So now I'm going to pay it forward and come to your house and I'll be just as good of a guest to you as you were to me. That was, that was a learning lesson for me, and once we did it that way, our community partners grew closer and tried actual friendships and not continue to be territorial.
Speaker 2:
Oh, my gosh Boy, do I see a lot of that.
Speaker 3:
Yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2:
Yeah, and it and it's all about. It's back to that relationship thing. Right, it's really hard to be territorial and gatekeeping when you've become friends.
Speaker 3:
Yeah, yeah, share resources. I mean, that was that was another thing, and in so many communities have these issues. So I'm I'm preaching to the I'm. You know I'm not saying anything new, but I think that's what the Rome Flake County Commission on Children and Youth we modeled. You know what you can have, this, you can, you can have it. You can have it. When we did our grants, we wanted everybody to collaborate with their grants. You know, we implemented that when we did many grants and I think when you as an organization or a community leader and this is something, this is nothing new but when you model the behavior that you want to see, when you be the change that you want to see and you're intentional and genuine behind it, people will follow you. And so I think you know that was that was something that really, really worked, and what did not work was just not doing that in the very beginning.
Speaker 2:
Yeah, not getting everybody involved. Yeah, yeah, gotcha, all right. So you have a new role and I don't. I don't know much about the National Family Support Network, so tell us all about that and what you're doing for them.
Speaker 3:
Sure. So the National Family Support Network was started in 2011. And we are the coordinating body for the Family Resource Centers in 41 states as well as the District of Columbia, ireland and Canada. We will be getting ready to launch the International Family Support Network and what's so exciting about it is in those 41 states there are, say, for example, georgia, our Florida family support networks, and I became a part of the Georgia Family Support Network and I actually was a trainer for them for this thing, this work. This is called the Standards of Quality Care for Children and Families. So I was a trainer for the Georgia Family Support Network while I was working with the Roanoke County Commission on Children and Youth and, yes, they asked me. They ended up asking me to apply for this job, but as the senior training. So I'm the senior training director for the National Family Support Network, and so I provide training resources and training and create curricula for the states the 41 states in Canada and Ireland and I just train the trainers, family resource centers in community outreach, in fatherhood programs in their states, and I love it. And, like I said, this has been started since 2011.
Speaker 3:
Before the word remote work was a thing, this organization was remote. We do not have a central location. We never have. We are a DC-based nonprofit. However, we do not have a central office.
Speaker 3:
And the exciting thing is all of our staff we work from home in our different time zones and we're able to support the 41 states that and DC and the different countries that are in our network. And it's so exciting because one of the things that holds our community together obviously is community partners but family resource centers and that's just a place where families can go to get the support that they need. Number one, before things hit the ceiling, but also even after things have hit the ceiling, you can go there and get the support, the parenting support, the community support, that hunkering support in times of need, those five family principles or five protective factors that we sometimes talk a lot about. We've discussed that and that's what you can do in Family Resource Centers. Go and get it and we're just, we coordinate it for them and make sure that we're all together, we're all on the same one accord and we're speaking the same language.
Speaker 2:
Do you know off the top of your head? For those of listeners who don't know what those five are, One of my favorite is concrete support in time of need.
Speaker 3:
That makes sense. That's my favorite. Resiliency, that's one of them. Also, you're quizzing me.
Speaker 2:
I know I'm totally putting you on the spot only because I can't remember. I bet we can find a link and put it in the show notes.
Speaker 3:
We definitely can. But yeah, like I said, resiliency. I'm thinking of the images, you know, and one of them is understanding your child's development and growth, and this is not the right term, but parents meet friends in those connections.
Speaker 2:
Yeah, that social connection yeah social connection.
Speaker 3:
So I think we did about three or four, so there's one more. But yeah, we can actually definitely put those in the chat. Yeah, awesome.
Speaker 2:
So, uh, yeah, and if you go to canada, uh, canada, or uh, ireland, and you need somebody to hold your bags for you, or you know, I don't know, I, I'd be all about that I'll come right.
Speaker 3:
Come right on, annie. You know, my first month I was in DC twice, no, three times actually. And then I was in Chicago and I was able to go to the Prevent Child Abuse America luncheon. I was able to number one meet everybody from the 41 states, from the 41 states. And then I was able to meet the directors of the Casey Fowley programs who support so many organizations throughout the US. So it was really exciting. Just to put, I've always I had always heard about them and those organizations, but never been in their space to show gratitude for all the support that they give to so many communities around the US and even internationally.
Speaker 2:
Oh, awesome, that's so fun. All right, so here are the five protective factors Parental resilience, social connections, concrete support in times of need, ladonna's favorite knowledge of parenting and child development, and social and emotional competence of children. That's awesome and, yeah, I'll definitely put that link in the show notes. Okay, as we wrap up here, I'm going to do something I haven't done before rapid fire questions. What do you love most about being a community leader? And I won't use the other word, but what? What do you not like so much?
Speaker 3:
I won't use the other word. But what do you not like so much? What do I love most? I think collaboration.
Speaker 3:
When you can get people together on one accord or I don't even care if they have different thoughts, but when one same thing, if we have one goal in mind, let's get them together, let's get the job done, and when they come together and we see the finished product, that's what's exciting for me is just getting people at the table who have really have the same heart. I love that and that that's that's my favorite and what you know, the the weak side of this is be you know what I have too, but but I, the one that really, really threatens my heart so much is when we we can get together, then we bring politics in. That's what really messes up the congruency and the togetherness and collaboration of a community. When you got people that are scratching the backs of others, you know I scratch my back, you scratch your back, you know you scratch my back and we can't get things done because politics small town, I will say small town community politics get in the way of communities thriving Right.
Speaker 2:
Yeah, and I think that's why those relationships are so important. I was telling somebody the other day I have lots of friends who don't have the same politics that I have, but we try to stay focused on what we do have in common and you know the values that we have in common and we try to stay focused on, you know, our relationship and that that that's got to be primary.
Speaker 2:
And that's one of the reasons why I started the podcast, because I got so tired of people arguing with each other because, no, nobody's being helped when we all go to our respective corners. Right, we've forgotten how to come together anyway. Back to rapid fire questions. What do you wish people knew about being a non-profit leader?
Speaker 3:
I wish people knew not to think nonprofit organizations don't have money. Stop, stop putting us at the bottom of the totem pole. And you know, even having like you know, a lot of times people say you know we have open options for everybody in finances and you know we can even. You know, while it could be $500 for a multi, you know million dollar organization or 5,000, you know it's $75 for the nonprofit. Stop doing that. But also nonprofit leaders, let's stop. Let's change the narrative of saying we can only afford to pay a small amount, because if we change that narrative then these bigger corporations and organizations will stop doing that to us. You know what I'm saying? Oh, I do.
Speaker 2:
I do Right. Yeah, absolutely All right. You're standing in front of your favorite spot in Rome, georgia. Where are?
Speaker 3:
you Town Green. Town Green is in downtown Rockmar, I mean Rome and we, in starting in June, we have First Friday concerts all the way through September and I absolutely love going downtown to the town green with the waterfall and the stage and the lights. And while I've never stood on the stage, I have stood on the dance floor and dance and I'm able to turn around, even if I'm walking back to my seat, I'm turning around and I'm walking back and I see all of our community, regardless of your race, regardless of your socioeconomic status. We're on one accord and if we're only one night only, or one month, you know, three or four months out of the summer, we're on one accord to get along and have fun and enjoy the weather and whatever kind of music that is. Yeah, put me there any day.
Speaker 2:
Put me there. I love it. I love those kinds of events. Atlanta Braves or Atlanta United, oh, atlanta United.
Speaker 3:
I knew she was going to say that United, oh, atlanta United. I knew she was going to say that Atlanta United. Come on, my son is a soccer guru and a player, so I can't help it Atlanta United.
Speaker 2:
All right, do you still hate evaluation? And for that. So, as you might have not surmised, ladonna, we've known each other for probably six years now right. And the first thing LaDonna ever said is I hate evaluation and every year she would like sneak that in. But I actually heard you like talking about outcomes earlier, so do you still hate evaluation?
Speaker 3:
I do not hate evaluation. You know I understand the value and importance of evaluation and just using it, using it to the best of your ability, and it can take you places that you never thought you could go. So, no, I do not hate evaluation. It works for you more than against you.
Speaker 2:
Oh, very good, Good answer. Um. So one piece of advice you have for community leaders before I let you go.
Speaker 3:
Become the community leader that you want the community that you live in to experience, and that includes your own personal growth. You got to. We have to grow as leaders and we can't we hear this all the time you can't lead from an empty well or from an empty cup. And as community leaders and I know we talk so much about self-care but we give so much to the community um, make sure you give at home. Make sure you give at home. Make sure you give that so much at home, but make sure that somewhere in your life somebody else is filling your cup back up so you can be better for those that you joyfully and lovingly serve on a daily basis, seven days a week, because that's the type of work that we do.
Speaker 2:
Yeah, I love it. I'm having flashbacks to that senior leader retreat that I invited you on in March. I didn't talk about this on social because I really wanted you all to have your private space. It was a pilot thing that I was doing and we just had five leaders not senior nonprofit leaders from all over Georgia and you were on my short list, so I was so excited that you got to come. It was. I didn't know that you were transitioning to your new role at the time, but you just added so much to that conversation, oh gosh.
Speaker 2:
Go ahead, ann, go ahead I was just gonna say I'm so excited to see where you go in your leadership.
Speaker 3:
Oh gosh, and it was more because I was transitioning. I think that was the value for it for me, because I called it my nonprofit respite weekend.
Speaker 3:
Good, because that's what I intended it to feel like, yeah, and when I'm talking to people about it, I said that was my respite. That was, I mean, one of the first times that I was away out of town without my husband, without my children, without my son, and I was actually around like-minded individuals and we weren't complaining. We were talking about what we've learned and how we can be better and what's next. So I definitely love that. That's something that I would love to do every year, and I've gained some new friends.
Speaker 3:
Yes, you have we text. We follow each other on social media and when we have questions, you know I can send them a text or an email and they've been valuable to me and I've learned from them.
Speaker 2:
Yeah, yeah. I'm so happy to hear that because I really wanted you guys to have a safe, restful place and I really didn't have an agenda other than you know. It popped in my head and I wanted to do it and that's the way I roll. So, last question before I let you get. Well, last two questions before I let you go. When you look to the future, what community possibilities do you see? Go?
Speaker 3:
When you look to the future, what community possibilities do you see? You know community possibilities that I see for me. I really, you know. I just see I see myself even like I am now. I was in a small town and fortunately I've been blessed with the opportunity to be able to expand and work with communities nationwide and internationally, and that's what I see. I continue to see myself growing and learning about people, learning about communities, learning about cultures, because everywhere that you go, people are different and communities are different and sometimes we can get stuck in where we are and not see outside of our community, of our community. So I see myself continuing to expand and taking what I have to offer further into the nation. I mean and that's my joy and passion just to share my heart with many communities.
Speaker 2:
Awesome, and I know you will. So, ladonna, if people listen to this, they want to learn more about you or they want to learn about the National Family Support Network. How can they get in touch with you?
Speaker 3:
S-L Collins. That's S-E-L-L-E Collins on Instagram, and if you want to find out more about the National Family Support Network, definitely go to our website, which is wwwnationalfamilysupportnetwork. But we're also on Facebook under National Family Support Network. We would love for you to join us. Come find out about us and, hey, we would love to see you become a part of one of our networks.
Speaker 2:
All right, well, thank you so much, ladonna. I've been wanting to have you on the podcast for a long time, so I'm finally glad we made that happen and I look forward to seeing you next week. We're going to have like a retreat reunion next week.
Speaker 3:
That's going to be fun. Thank you so much.
Speaker 2:
And that's going to be fun. Thank you so much, and I really enjoyed this. Oh, awesome Thanks, ladonna. Thank you, hi everybody. Thank you so much for joining me on today's episode of Community Possibilities. If you've liked what you've heard, maybe it's helped you think about something that you weren't aware of, maybe this conversation has helped you think about something a little differently, or maybe you've just been inspired. Could you do me a favor, could you like and share the podcast wherever you listen, and if you could take that extra step of posting a comment, that would be so helpful. Thanks so much, everybody See you next time, thank you.